Rediscovering ancestral sexual instincts

with Dr. Marianne Brandon

As a society, we have become disconnected from our ancestral food traditions. In a similar way, many of us have also lost touch with our primal instincts when it comes to sexual intimacy. Dr. Marianne Brandon is an author, clinical psychologist, and diplomat in sex therapy and, in today’s episode, she helps us rediscover these instincts and improve our most intimate relationships.

She touches on a variety of approaches to enhance our relationships including: the importance of being present, vulnerability, and communication. She also describes common problems experienced by couples in this area and how to overcome them. Throughout the conversation, she points to how men and women differ sexually, emphasizing that these differences are complementary and should be embraced rather than erased.

Finally, Marianne reveals that one of the major roadblocks to physical intimacy is that many of us are stuck in our heads. Marianne emphasizes the importance of being mindful and open and honest with our partners. Her advice, when heeded, can result in increased sexual satisfaction that will benefit our overall health and sense of well-being.

Notes

One of the major roadblocks to positive intimacy is that many of us are stuck in our heads. Marianne emphasizes the importance of being mindful and open and honest with our partners. Although most primates are not monogamous, Marianne assures us that sex can remain exciting and pleasurable even in long-term relationships.

This episode highlights…

Why we spend much of the time using our cerebral cortex, the more recently evolved part of our brain
How spending time in nature and engaging in activities like yoga, massage, dance, and tai chi can benefit our sex lives
That communication about sex can be emotionally-charged and the conversation should be ongoing
How expressing your desires to your partner can enhance passion and satisfaction
The importance of vulnerability and trust and why they are assets to monogamous relationships
How enmeshment among couples can result in decreased sexual desire
The complementary nature of masculine and feminine instincts
How women are more sexually fluid than men, especially as they age
That spontaneous desire is more common in men, while women in long-term relationships will report an experience of responsive desire
That women report need to feel like their heart and mind and body are all in agreement
How men are generally more reactive to visual triggers than women
Why sex is good for both physical and emotional well being