How can we rise above limiting beliefs or our present circumstances? How is our mindset tied to our health? And how can we renew both our minds and core being to realize our full potential? Peter Crone, also known as the Mind Architect, is a writer, speaker, and thought leader in human awakening and potential. Today, he shines a light on the lies or stories we tell ourselves or submit to that don’t serve us. Peter explains how inadequacy and insecurity can lead to sickness or dis-ease. And he offers insights for learning to live in a way that enables us to face life differently and experience true freedom and peace.
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Episode Transcript
Within the below transcript the bolded text is Hilda
.Do you ever feel, “I don’t matter, I’m not enough, I’m not who I should be?” If you do, you’re not alone. These thoughts cross all of our minds, but we don’t have to live according to these narratives. There are tools to move from the stress or dis-ease that they cause to a life of ease and freedom. This is Episode 435 and our guest is Peter Crone. Peter is known as the Mind Architect. He is a writer, speaker, and thought leader in human awakening and potential. Peter shines a light on the lies or stories that we tell ourselves or submit to that don’t serve us, like the ones I said at the top. He points out that feelings of inadequacy and insecurity can lead to sickness or dis-ease.
In this episode, he offers insights for learning to live in such a way that enables us to rise above being victims of circumstance, that helps us recognize that every trigger or challenge that we face is a gift and that there are tools for breaking free from constraints that hinder true freedom and peace. Before we dive into the conversation, I want to invite you to the Wise Traditions Conference in October 2023 in Kansas City, Missouri. It is going to be phenomenal.
It’s always good to be together to share conversations and wonderful wise traditions and friendly meals. This 2023 in particular, we have Naomi Wolf as the keynote speaker, Alex Zeck, Dr. Tom Cowan, Sally Fallon Morell, and many other friends who are going to be present bringing their best to panels and workshops. Please sign up. Go to Wise Traditions for information and to register now. I hope to see you there.
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Visit Peter‘s website
Register for the Wise Traditions Conference in Kansas City
Check out our sponsors: Offally Good Cooking’s Liver Lover Challenge and Optimal Carnivore
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Welcome to the show, Peter.
Thank you, Hilda. Good to see you.
As the Mind Architect, you help so many people overcome anxieties, limiting beliefs, and so forth. I wanted you to kick things off with a story of someone you’ve helped deal with anxiety.
It’s sadly a pretty prevalent condition that people deal with. I could assert everybody I work with has some degree of anxiety as a gradient, a scale. In my mastermind, which is a container online that I do where I teach people my methodology and I equally coach people at the same time so they vicariously get to see my work in action, there have been quite a few people. I can think of a man and a woman who struggled with the same thing when this gentleman was in a relationship. His partner had said that she wanted to branch out or experiment a little bit and maybe explore with other partners, but not necessarily in their relationship, which is each to their own, but it was leaving him a little anxious about what that means.
Juxtaposed to that, there was also a woman who was a mother with three kids and she was experiencing some abuse from her partner. Abuse is a big word, but more verbal and emotional versus physical, which is horrific for anyone who has to go through that. I love the correlation that they both had very different life circumstances, but they were both dealing with the anxiety of, “What does this mean? Where is this going?” They were both living in what I call a context. Context is the word that I use that delineates these subconscious programs or limitations that I assert we all have as part of the primal conditioning of a human being.
For both of them, what we revealed as part of our work was that they were living in a world called “I don’t matter.” When their view of themselves, who they were for themselves is that they don’t matter. They had both attracted partners who dismissed their needs a little bit. As we emit a particular vibration based on how we view ourselves, we attract like circumstances. He felt he didn’t really matter, which was going back to all of these things to his childhood where his brother got more attention. He never felt respected by his parents. Now he had a mate, and even though that wasn’t her language, her exploration or wanting to pursue other partners was a reflection of that energy inside of him where his needs didn’t matter.
Likewise, for the woman, she said, “As long as the kids are okay, I can handle the abuse,” which was her way of reinforcing the fact that deep down, unbeknownst to herself, she had learned to also deny her own needs and feelings. It was so beautiful to witness that this is always the case when people see their own blind spots. They’re like, “I’ve lived like that for 30-plus years.” Their anxiety, to answer your question, was a byproduct of looking through that particular lens of, “I don’t matter.”
When we live in that space, then we’re always waiting for the next form of dismissal, energy abuse, or disrespect. That leaves somebody quite tense or what we could say anxious. With my work, I help them to locate these blind spots and then to investigate the validity of them, which is always a lie. It’s something that we created when we were young. What they realize is in the absence of that, there’s complete freedom and both of their lives transform dramatically. Hopefully, that makes sense to the audience.
What’s coming to my mind is I’ve been reading Don Miguel Ruiz’s book, The Four Agreements. He says that if someone calls you on the street, “You’re stupid,” if you agree with that in your mind, it plants a seed and then later may become the lens through which you see the world. For some reason, this man and this woman agreed with the idea, “I don’t matter,” whatever message they got when they were younger, and then they started seeing the world through that lens. You help them become aware that it’s a lens that they can remove.
It’s a dissolution process. In my work, I often use a line saying, “I don’t solve problems, I dissolve them.” Whereas most experts, with no judgment, are trained to try and solve people’s problems, which actually in a very subtle way perpetuates the idea that someone has a problem.
This is so fascinating. This idea, “I don’t matter,” is probably a common one as you’re suggesting. You’ve seen it in your mastermind throughout your work. What are some other common limiting beliefs that you come across the most often?
One that everyone can relate to is the feeling of general inadequacy, which we can put under the auspices of, “I’m not good enough. I’m not enough.” Most people have had usually many bouts of that experience sometimes for decades, where there’s a deep-seated feeling of just being insufficient for who we are. Who I am fundamentally is not enough and then we develop a myriad of compensation skills, becoming a perfectionist to people pleaser, working hard, looking good, whatever it is that we do as a means to try and compensate for the deeper feeling of inadequacy, which, sadly, reinforces it.
As you were suggesting earlier, it doesn’t allow us to live in freedom. It’s something that we’re wed to and tied to. We think, “I must keep working this hard. I must please these people or I’ll be rejected.” That’s slavery. That’s not freedom.
Exactly. That’s why my main product is freedom.
Where do you think that we undervalue ourselves so much? Where do you think all this self-doubt comes from or these feelings of inadequacy and so forth?
If I’m going to be specific with the language where it comes from, it’s all self-generated. We think that it’s because mom said this or dad did that. We were berated, belittled, or hit in a very scary environment growing up. It’s like, “I feel inadequate because my parents never gave me any attention because my brother was the academic or the athlete. They were always singing his praises and I was the neglected child.”
That might look like the cause. Without getting too esoteric, for me, the feelings of doubt and inadequacy are what we arrive with. We are here as part of the human experience to reconcile, transmute, and transcend the very constraints of binding the soul that we are. In this particular realm, the paradigm of planet Earth is the ideal dimension to do that. That’s pretty heady, I know.
We’ve conversed about this before. I come from a faith background, and it seems to me this is what Christians would call original sin. It’s not just necessarily rebellion against God, but it’s a sense that something’s missing, “I’m not in the right relationship with a higher power or even with my neighbor. Something’s off.”
It is a fundamental flaw, everybody, to some degree, whoever they are. I work with the best of the best in all areas of life, whether it’s sports, business, or entertainment, the greatest performers, and yet even they as human beings who represent the highest standard of their particular industry have, at the deep recesses of their subconscious, some feeling of inadequacy or imperfection. At one level, we can say that is what drives people to try, compensate, overcome, and create strategies to disprove it or to hide it. For me, it is something that unites us. It’s quite beautiful when you recognize that the fundamental feeling of being human is that we are, at the rudimentary level, quite flawed. It’s the opportunity to develop more love and acceptance for who we are and for others by recognizing our humanity versus something to try and compensate for.
The fundamental feeling of being human is at the rudimentary level, quite flawed, which is the opportunity to develop more love and acceptance for who we are and for others by recognizing our humanity.
Oprah Winfrey has said that the question she gets the most often once the cameras are turned off from her guests on her talk show that she used to have is, “How did I do? Did I do okay?” That vulnerability or that flawed feeling is coming out. In the personal, there’s also the universal, and that’s what you’re getting at. It is that we all have that and there’s something beautiful about it. Is that what I hear you saying?
Yes, both components, the compensation for and the acquiescence of. Meaning there’s an adorable quality of a human being who’s trying to compensate for a feeling of inadequacy. We can all get it, like a little kid who’s trying hard to do the right thing to garner the love of mom or dad. It’s adorable, yet we’re doing the same thing as an adult, a grown woman who is putting on an outfit, doing her hair, maybe even going to the extremes of plastic surgery or whatever she feels she needs to do in order to get that love and acceptance. It becomes more complex as an adult. Equally, the man who thinks that he has to be the fastest and the strongest with the six-pack abs and the beautiful car.
What’s driving that is a longing, a craving for universal love and acceptance. “See me. Admire me. Accept me.” What that does that most people don’t recognize until they do and they see the futility of it is it perpetuates the flawed perspective that we’re not fundamentally loved and accepted. We’re asking for the exogenous world, the external world, and other people to do the work for us, which is why most relationships don’t work and most people have unfulfilled lives because the mechanism that’s driving the search for love and acceptance is itself the very constraint that we’re trying to overcome. Meaning it’s self-fulfilling.
It reminds me of that old Jerry MaGuire movie where, in one of the most poignant love scenes, one of them says, “You complete me.”
I was working with him at the time.
It seems lovely and everybody’s crying. It’s actually not a very healthy way to have a relationship.
It is a complete disservice to what it means to be in a true, powerful, intimate relationship. It’s pointing to the fact that, “I am missing something.” There’s a lack or there’s an energy of scarcity and adequacy, and that the other person, the onus is on them. It becomes a demanding energy. This is why most relationships don’t work because the underlying subtext is, “As long as who you are meant to be for me, then I’ll be okay. If you are not, then I’m going to be upset. If you leave me, then I’m going to be devastated.”
I don’t know every single relationship on the planet, but the construct of most relationships is built on the quintessential foundation of sand. Everybody is unbeknownst to themselves in a very vulnerable position. You are saying that my happiness, my contentment, my sense of love, and my work are wrapped up in your perception of me and your presence in my life. That’s a very flawed way to have any relationship.
Most relationships are built on the quintessential foundation of sand because everybody is unknown to themselves in a very vulnerable position.
I’m wondering apart from your mastermind and just in this conversation if you can give us a snapshot or a tool of how to start to recognize what these unhealthy patterns are, these childlike patterns of wanting attention, affection, and approval. How can we start to recognize those in our own day-to-day life?
It’s unavoidable. Just live life. You’re going to get triggered, you’re going to get upset, and you’re going to feel let down. You’re going to feel abandoned and rejected. You’re going to feel people don’t notice you or don’t respect you. The litany of human experiences that we call everyday life that in lay terms, it’s like, “You got off or upset by something,” that right there is the treasure. Live your life and then notice where you get upset by anything. Wherever you get upset by anything, I guarantee you, it is simply your ego that is being triggered, which is ego being the catchall for these conversations or narratives of inadequacy, security, or scarcity that are part of the human condition.
That’s the access. It is to live life. See where you get upset. It takes a little bit of work. Sometimes it’s good to have a friend who can listen without judgment and share what the circumstance was of what you got upset by, “So-and-so didn’t text me back.” What is that revealing at a deeper level? In reality, nothing in circumstances creates your suffering. It’s all based on your interpretation of circumstance, which is you against you.
That’s access to freedom. See what upset you, then investigate what’s at the deeper level of the upset. That will be something that is a repetitive pattern based on some experience from childhood, which itself, even back in childhood, was still the trigger for a constraint that you arrived with as a being who is in this paradigm to transcend your own constraints.
The trigger is a treasure. It’s a way to understand yourself more if you take the time to do that deep dive. I feel like most of us, when we feel triggered, want to punch a pillow or just go work out and get over it. We try to move on, but we’re missing an opportunity to grow so that we can be that healthier person you were describing earlier.
Punching a pillow or working out is a pretty wholesome responses. Most people smoke weed, have alcohol, have a cigarette, scream and shout, kick the cat, or abuse the children. To go to the usual suspects of how people handle their own suffering is normally not that attractive. That explains the world we have of corruption, tyranny, lies, abuse, and harm. We’re not a very advanced species. We hurt ourselves, we hurt each other, and we heard the home that we all share. You don’t have to look very far to see that there’s a lot of work to be done.
I also like what you just said about you versus you. I have a friend who has a husband who loves her beautiful kids, all the things. She told me that she felt trapped and like she was in prison. I thought, “This is fascinating because it was all the way she was looking at it.” I’m not saying things are perfect, and I’m not trying to gloss over whatever challenges she might have in that suburban home. I’m just saying it was something about the way she was seeing it where another person might be perfectly happy in that same situation.
Someone could even be unhappy in an even better circumstance. You start to see, “Circumstances aren’t the cause of precursor to my experience.” One of the biggest misperceptions and illusions of the human experience is that, “I feel the way I feel because of what’s going on around me or what someone did.” That’s the quintessential where you’re a victim of circumstance.
I love that old joke. Someone comes up to their friend, and they’re like, “How are you doing?” He says, “Not bad, under the circumstances.” The friend’s like, “What are you doing there?”
That’s a very powerful understanding. Most people think they’re a victim of circumstances. The subtle distinction, which is one of the cornerstones of my work, is to, “Go a level deeper for people. That’s why they have these bigger hearts.” No, you’re actually a victim of your own interpretation of circumstances. That’s different.
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Coming up. Peter explains why affirmations may not be the best strategy for lasting change.
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Now, I want to talk about some tools. We already said there are ways to identify by paying attention to triggers. What are some tools for lifting us up into new patterns? Would it be a matter of reciting affirmations? How can we reshape our behavior?
I’m not a fan of affirmations. I think they’re strategies for a person who doesn’t feel good. It’s like you look in the mirror and like, “You’re a champion. I love you. You’re a winner.” The being that is reciting those affirmations isn’t those things. Otherwise, you wouldn’t say it. For me, behavior is way down the line. You asking how we change behaviors, that’s where most people go to an expert. The expert will say, “Don’t do this, do that.” It’s in the realm of action. That, to me, is a disservice to what’s going on, which is you have to deal with the you that you are for yourself, which is a very unusual expression that we are something for ourselves.
That is a blind spot. The triggers are the access to see, “I got upset by my sister-in-law saying this. My mom or boss did that.” Whatever the event is, is irrelevant. It is purely the catalyst to reveal where within ourselves we’re still confined, we’re still in fear, and we still have an inadequacy or a doubt. That is then what inspires further investigation into what the deeper fear and deeper limitation are. Until you get to that, you can try and change your behavior all you want. How many people join a gym in the first week of January only to cancel their membership by the end of February?
They try to change their behavior, but it’s futile because they don’t change who they are for themselves. The access to changing behavior is not in doing something or using willpower, but rather in literally becoming a different version of yourself, which is easier said than done. The access to becoming a new you is to realize the lies of the previous you. One of the lies, for example, that we’ve just touched on being those two people that I helped in my mastermind is the idea that who they were is that they don’t matter. That’s not the truth, that’s how they felt. They have evidence over the years that then reinforces it so it starts to feel like truth, but it’s still not.
When I take people through these exercises and I work with them, we investigate the validity of the lie that they’re living in. When they see that it is precisely that, a lie, I then invite them to consider, “Who could you be in the absence of that previous narrative that was very limiting?” In the case of those two people I spoke about earlier, “Who would you be in the absence of thinking that you don’t matter?” Now the brain has to reconfigure itself, “I would feel liberated. I would feel special. I would feel like I can do what I want to do.”
Now their brain is literally reconfiguring who they would be in the world, how they would communicate, and then consequently also how they would act. It’s not, “You don’t feel like you matter? Here’s a prescription.” You should make sure that people understand your point. These would be strategies for the same person. What I’m helping people to do is dissolve the constraint. In the absence of the constraint, a new world becomes available to them.
What’s coming to my mind is a friend of mine, when she walks into a room, it’s like she is the Queen of Sheba. She’s absolutely beautiful, but she walks like it. She walks as if, “I was meant to be here. I was born for something like this.” It’s beautiful. She’s not doing that to convince herself that she is worthy. It’s because she’s already believing that she’s worthy and that she’s walking that way. That’s what I hear you say.
It is a little bit deeper than that. It’s not even a belief. It’s who you are for yourself. Beliefs come after that. If this is a genuine representation of her, then it’s not that she believes she’s worthy. It’s that who she is for herself is worth itself. It is subtle but very powerful to understand the difference between those statements. That’s the affirmation comment you made. Someone could try and convince themselves, “I am worthy.”
You write it down 1,000 times and say it in the mirror every morning. What you’re doing is you’re actually reinforcing, sustaining, and perpetuating the fact that you are not. Otherwise, why would you have to keep saying it? There’s a difference between believing and being, we could say. Your friend who walks in, the Queen of Sheba, she’s just being worthy. She’s not believing that she’s worthy. It is very different.
Some of our conversation is similar to the one that I’ve had with Dr. Bruce Lipton who also talked about how some disease has its root in some emotional trauma or something that we don’t understand about who we are. A friend of mine who was very sick is like, “It’s just so easy for him to say.” She was having a hard time understanding her own paradigm of sickness. She couldn’t get her internal self to that place of wholeness and wellness that subconsciously she needed to be at. It’s super profound.
I just did a mastermind on health itself to help people understand why, unbeknownst to ourselves, there’s no guilt or shame or fault that we create sickness. It’s physics. If we live internally in a state of dis-ease and why we are in the absence of ease, we’re in survival mode because we think we’re inadequate, insecure, or there’s something missing in our life. We are in a perpetual state of searching or looking for, which is perpetuating the whole idea that, “I’m not where I want to be,” which is a stressful state to be in. “I’m not who I should be,” is even more stressful.
That cascades into our physiology. We live in a fight-or-flight. Its impact on our organs is deleterious. At some point, you have no choice but to manifest the sickness. Once you undo all of that, you find ease. What is ease? Another word for is freedom or peace. Your body is like, “There’s nothing to be in fight or flight about because there’s nothing wrong. If there’s nothing wrong, then I don’t have to be in this perpetual state of stress.” As a result, we can not only not be sick but reverse the current aging that we’ve been on.
If I’m hearing you correctly, the body, its state, is a reflection of our internal state.
The body, its state, is a reflection of our internal state.
Correct. They’re one on the same thing.
I’ve always thought it had a correlation because people say, “That person makes me sick.” I’m not surprised later when you get sick. It’s like the body’s trying to get to coherence and you’re saying you’re sick, so it’s going to get sick.
That’s a very broad way of looking at it on the surface. As I said, a disease that people manifest over time, chronic, acute, or otherwise, is really an energetic expression of dis-ease, the absence of ease. When we’re at ease, meaning we could say in lay terms, “I’m relaxed, I’m happy, I’m content.” For me, it is more profound as looking at, “I’m free, I’m at peace,” then we are in what’s called the parasympathetic part of our autonomic nervous system, which is known as rest digest.
When we are not in a state of ease, we’re in a state of dis-ease, the absence of ease. That’s how most people live, the hamster wheel of life of, “I’m trying to get somewhere,” even the expression, “I’m getting there. I got to work harder, pay off the mortgage, meet the right one, finally get the abs, then I’ll be happy one day.” That whole American Dream or the pursuit of happiness, that whole thing, all it does is it reinforces and sadly perpetuate the idea that, “I’m not where I’m supposed to be and I’m not who I’m supposed to be,” which, in lay terms, is a stressful existence.
I can imagine celebrities, political leaders, or athletes who are in competition with others, how quick it would be for them to feel more stressed because they’re not at the level they want to be. “So-and-so got the Super Bowl gig.” Talk about dis-ease. That’s not an enviable life in any way, shape, or form.
That is the quintessential underlying current for perfectionism or hard work. It is the idea that I am trying to become someone, which only reinforces the idea that who I am is insufficient. Again, you’re back to stress and disease. That manifests over time. Depending on how robust your constitution is, some people are built like an ox as they say. They may be in a state of disease for many more years before it manifests. Somebody who’s got more of a fragile, sensitive system, their disease is going to manifest pretty quickly. What is that showing up as? Is that like tremors? Is it IBS? Is it acid reflux? Is it sleeplessness, anxiety, depression, or addiction?
It manifests later down as Parkinson’s and all the different, more chronic diseases, the cancers of the world. That’s over time. That doesn’t typically happen overnight. It’s just when your body is in a constant state of stress and dis-ease, then it’s only a matter of time before that cascades through every cell in your physiology. It presents when you’re 30, 40, 50, and 60 as, “You’ve got like Parkinson’s, Alzheimer’s, cancer, or cardiac disease.” That’s because who you’ve been for the last 3 or 4 decades is somebody who, at the fundamental level of your subconscious, feels inadequate or insecure.
That has left you in a constant to a mild state of stress, which you have compensated for in a myriad of ways, which is an exhausting proposition that, over time, has just been the degeneration of your physicality. It’s physics. I say it very blasé, I understand, but I want people to be able to meet me there and recognize that, “It’s not that complicated when you understand the energetics of what it is to be human.”
Peter, when do you think you had an a-ha moment in this area where you realized, “I’m in a state of dis-ease. I’m stressed, feeling competitive, I’m moving out of an understanding of myself as inadequate.”
When I was 29, I was in a relationship. The woman I was dating left me, which for me, in my state of disease, was very disorienting and inspired a huge amount of suffering, which was the gift to reveal that I was always in a state of suffering, which in my terminology was the fear of loss. My parents died when I was very young. By extension, I had, as a young kid, learned to be fearful of losing anything of value to me. No one’s going to begrudge me that particular perspective that makes sense. My mom dies when I’m seven. My dad goes to work when I’m seventeen and never comes back because he was in a shipping disaster. No one is going to go, “That’s stupid that that kid had a fear of loss.” No, that makes total sense based on the conditions of my life.
When I met someone when I’m older, and the first time that I felt I was in love, my underlying survival instinct is like, “You’ve got something so special here. Do everything you can not to lose it.” When you lose things, it really hurts. One of my quotes is, “Past hurt informs future fear.” My past hurt is, in this case, loss, which then I later transcended and realized I’d never lost anything since my parents died. Loss is a narrative. It’s not an actual event. In the absence of fearing loss, which is what I got through this experience when this woman left me and took a while to sleepless nights, calling friends and having to do a lot of deep dives, I realized, “I’d been living in a perpetual state of fear of loss,” which is why I was the perfect boyfriend, which was not only my authentic self.
I was really generous, kind, loving, considerate, affectionate, all the things a woman would want. The undercurrent was also the residual fear of my past that had me a little bit more attached or a lot bit more attached. Even though who I was, and I consider myself to be one of the most loving, generous men you could ever meet, it was tainted and contaminated with my own ego’s concern for the fact that she might leave me, which is fear fulfilling on itself. Fear will break its own heart is the term I use.
That was the gift. I just happened to be the person who would look at the trigger, to go back to our earlier conversation, and find the treasure in it, which I was living in the lie called the fear of loss. When I realized I’d never lost anything and nor could I ever lose anything, then I found complete peace. More profoundly, my brain was constantly trying to figure out the future, “Where is she? Is she with someone else? Is she going to come back and see me?” which was creating a lot of my anxiety. I realized that the very nature of life is uncertainty. We were all clueless. I didn’t know where she was. I didn’t know if she was dating anyone. I certainly didn’t know if she’d ever come back to me.
For the first time in my life at that ripe old age of 29, I suddenly realized that I just don’t know. I was, for the first time in my life, completely okay with not knowing. That cascaded freedom and peace through my body and every cell of my body in a way that I didn’t even know was possible and I’d certainly never experienced.
Now it’s part of your mission to help other people discover that freedom as well.
Correct. Last I checked, everybody would love that. That, to me, is the reason it is being human. That’s why we’re here. Not to establish more status, get more money, or have the perfect partner, the dream job, or the big home. No, we are here for one purpose only, which is to break free from the constraints with which we arrived.
As you can tell from this conversation, I found this work fascinating, but I can’t help but think and put on the skeptic’s hat for a minute and wonder. What do you say to people who are like, “This is a bunch of mumbo jumbo. I don’t need to do introspection. Hard work has got me where I’m at and I’m just going to keep hustling.”
I don’t say anything to them. I’m not here to disprove anyone’s beliefs. Have at it.
Tell me the story of someone who had a different point of view who came to you and said, “I want to be in this mastermind. I want to work through this issue I have in my life.” Can you tell us another story of a life change, Peter?
There was one girl. Some of these stories are pretty heavy. She is gay and she was hurt by two men. It is pretty heavy to listen to that story, yet what I helped her realize is what that created as a fundamental perspective that she was stuck in was the world of feeling she’s not safe. It is an incredibly traumatic experience that I wouldn’t wish upon anyone and I certainly don’t condone. Even when I met her, her whole room was dark, the blinds were down, and she was not typically leaving her house, all behavioral adaptations to the world that she was viewing, which is she was, on a primal level, not safe.
Like me and the fear of loss and the girlfriend that I didn’t want her to leave me, we are not going to begrudge her based on the traumatic experience she went through. Nonetheless, that was the experience. She now was living in her own generated level of constraint that unbeknownst to her, albeit triggered by the event, was now being sustained by her own brain. The brain is designed to predict and protect. Whenever there’s any trauma or past hurt, then the brain tends to be very vigilant around anything associated with that particular experience. For her, the world, and particularly in this event where it was a surprise, it’s not something that was coordinated or planned.
Everything can be a potential threat, which in lay terms meant that she was looking through the lens, “I’m not safe,” which gave rise to her anxiety, her worry, sleeplessness, and the fact that she didn’t want to venture out in life and certainly didn’t want to explore or have fun. To go back to the mechanisms that I teach people in the mastermind, it is investigating the validity of that. The event maybe was the catalyst for the feeling and then the perspective of not being safe. The “I’m not safe,” statement, the lens she’s looking through, is not a fundamental truth. It’s a feeling and certainly nothing that we would begrudge her having as an after-effect of that event.
She was then actually perpetuating that experience through her own remembrance of it. As I tell most people, you’re not worried about a future that hasn’t happened. You’re trying to avoid the repetition of a memory that you didn’t accept. She worked with me, and I showed her that the, “I’m not safe,” is not a fundamental primal truth. It is a justified feeling, but one that was completely compromising her experience of life. What was so powerful is in the very next module, which was a couple of weeks later, in this case, we were doing it once a month at that time. In the second module, nobody recognized her. She’d gone on holiday to Hawaii. She was laughing and dancing. Some guys had even tried to pick her up and she very politely dismissed.
She said, “I just don’t have any fear. It’s crazy. I feel completely free.” The beauty of this work is transcending these constraints, most of which are blind spots. For this reason, people can’t be accountable. There’s no fault. When you do see them, there’s an immense amount of empowerment by virtue of being responsible for the lens that you’ve been looking through and no longer letting that constrain the way that you feel, live, and experience life.
I want to pose to you now the question I like to pose at the end of the show. If the audience could do one thing to improve their health, and it could be mental, emotional, or physical, what would you recommend that they do?
To me, everything fundamentally comes down to perspective. I would invite everybody to discover where they are not free. Usually, it’s because of an unaccepted history. The greatest access to health, because health to me is inextricably linked to the state of mind, is usually for people to be able to forgive themselves for their history. People are incredibly hard on themselves and usually have a myriad of feelings of failure, and regret that they disappointed or let down people. They carry this weight of self-judgment.
The greatest access to health is for people to forgive themselves for their history.
One of my most popular quotes is, “What happened, happened and couldn’t have happened any other way because it didn’t.” That includes everything that we’ve done. That doesn’t mean that there weren’t consequences for our behaviors, but it doesn’t also mean that we’re supposed to be perfect so people could find the grace of self-forgiveness. They would find on the other side of that an immense amount of freedom.
Thank you so much. This has been an amazing conversation. We are so glad that you were on our show.
You’re welcome. Thank you.
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Our guest was Peter Crone. Visit his website Peter Crone for more resources and insights. You can visit my website, Holistic Hilda for more from me and what I have to offer. For a review from Apple Podcasts, I have to read this one because it makes me laugh, “Great info on food,” but not great for this person who gave us three stars. “Super excellent podcast for discovering the greatness of drinking urine and the evils of science. Not great for anyone who isn’t insane.” This is a review from Chairyoh. Chairyoh, thanks for your honesty. Seriously, every review may intrigue folks to check us out. You too can leave us a review on Apple Podcasts. Give us as many stars as you like, and tell us straight up what you think of the show. Thank you so much for reading, my friends. Stay well and remember to keep your feet on the ground and your face to the sun.
About Peter Crone
Peter Crone works with everyone from world-class athletes to stay-at-home parents to redesign the subconscious mind. We exist within limiting mental constructs that dictate our thoughts, feelings, actions, and the results we experience. Peter helps people and groups step outside of the world as they know it by identifying mental constructs that have been holding them back. Peter’s work explores the fundamental issues that affect us all to foster a deeper understanding of our common humanity. Peter is a writer, speaker, and thought leader in human awakening and potential. Learn more at petercrone.com.
Important Links
- Peter Crone
- Wise Traditions Conference
- The Four Agreements
- Liver Lover Challenge
- Optimal Carnivore
- Holistic Hilda
- Apple Podcasts – Wise Traditions
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